Take this simple Gravity Quotient Test.  If you answer YES to three or more questions, you probably have a gravity problem and should seek our guidance. 
 
- Do you own or use a pop-up toaster?
 
- Do you often ride elevators?
 
- Have you ridden in an airplane within the last 36 months?
 
- As a child, did you own a yo-yo?
 
- Have you ever used a pogo stick?
 
- Did your parents describe you as a "bouncing baby girl/boy"?
 
- Is the quotient of your weight in pounds divided by your height in inches more than 1.8?
 
- Is your sense of humor reasonably well honed?
 
- Have there been episodes in your life in which you used gravity without thinking about it?
 
- Do you have ten dollars?
  
 
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